You did not need the big boat to sail

If you don't like sailing, or living on the sea, that is okay, it would be very crowded out here if everybody wanted to live on the big blue or drift around tropical paradise. There are a million other ways to be happy — pick one and good luck. If you find one that is really working for you, write an article like this, so others who feel the same way can try it too.

Increasingly though, we are meeting people who like the idea of sailing, but not the reality. With one foot in each camp and both hands on their checkbook, they set about trying to create 'Sailing Light' — a kind of synthetic, microwaveable, TV dinner version of sailing, by buying and fitting out a boat to be as much like their home on land as possible. Open almost any 'sailing' magazine and you will be overwhelmed with the marketing of products designed to make your boat more like a house - and virtually all of it is a result of modern man's apparently endless need to consume, rather than the demands of seamanship. If you want to live in a houseboat, no problem! Have at it, and good luck. Nothing wrong with that at all. What concerns me though, is that potential sea gypsies who are tempted by the romance of the sea are often drawn to sailing magazines or the local marina to help visualize an alternative future for themselves. And what do they see?
Boats that cost hundreds of thousands of dollars, full of ridiculous gadgets designed with 'sale' and not 'sail' in mind. If you are a natural consumer, happily vacuuming up all you can and judging your success or failure by how much more stuff you consumed this year compared to last (some economists call this 'growth' and genuinely consider it desirable), then what you will see in the marina will confirm your depressingly common world view. However, this can be quite discouraging for those whose motivation for jumping on the bus to the marina or picking up a sailing magazine is that they suspect there may be a better and more affordable way of going to Sea.

The Good News 

I am pleased to say that there is a much better alternative to simply bringing consumerism offshore. If you can block your ears to marketing, misinformation, and snobbery, take a good, honest look at what resources you have, (or what you are likely to have) and make a plan that includes an affordable, small sea boat, then literally, the whole world is out there for you to discover. With the right attitude, you will be surprised how much fun you can have on the sea on a small budget. I imagine most people reading this article to be already a little excited at the prospect of becoming a small, sustainable speck on a beautiful blue ocean, having some adventures and making some new friends. If, however, you remain unconvinced and secretly believe that 'getting real and getting gone' is a metaphor for 'losers on small boats' then brother, we have a lot of getting real to do if you don't want to waste the price of this article '
All we ask is that you hear us out. If at the end of this article, you are still convinced that going to sea in anything less than a mega-yacht is some kind of 'loss', then thanks for reading anyway. You are free to continue dreaming of million-dollar yachts on the internet and Lara Croft in a thong. No harm done.
Though what we hope you will discover in these pages is that, with a slight change in approach, living on the blue ocean without worry is an attainable dream and one of the last great adventures still available to ordinary people without huge resources. But there is a catch. The sea and what it asks of you requires a different sort of human being. Twenty-first century post-modern cynicism won't work here. Neither will witty put-downs serve you any advantage. Most of the values we learned 'getting ahead' will not only prove largely useless but can in many ways cause problems when exported to sea
The sea is the same as it has always been and you will have to develop the right attitude if you wish to travel safely upon it with the money you actually have, rather than what you dream of having. This process largely consists of spring cleaning all the messages we are constantly bombarded with by our society and media as to what constitutes a desirable boat or a successful life. You will also need a good bullshit detector to recognize all the non-essential toys and inappropriate designs that salesmen try to scare us into buying. Microsoft Windows might be on its 10th version, but the sea is most definitely Ocean 1.0.
There have been some great improvements in sailing gear for sure, but most of what you need hasn't really changed at all. The good news is (as you have probably guessed by now) that having huge pots of money is the least important aspect of living on the sea, and may even detract from your enjoyment of your new life.
When I originally published the above picture on Facebook, it was to highlight the ridiculous ostentation of the boat in the background, which belongs to Carlos Slim — the world's richest man. One fill-up of his mighty diesel tanks is more than twice the price of our modest little home Calypso in the foreground. I was completely stunned and surprised by the amount of people whose Facebook comments were along the lines of, "can you get me invited aboard?"
They didn't mean Calypso.
I was surprised and a little disappointed. I had hoped that the yuppie values of the eighties had disappeared with Wham and red spectacles. Yet this is the attitude of so many in this age where we still seem to value wealth, luxury and celebrity above all else - even above the planet. Carlos Slim's little boat uses 1000 liters of fuel an hour. We use 150 liters a year. All that exhaust lies on the surface of the sea and acidifies the water. What joy can you get from arriving at a beautiful bay knowing that it will one day be devoid of at least half the marine life (and probably 100% of the coral reef which is particularly sensitive to acid levels) because of people like you? I often wonder what the owner of a superyacht says to his guests when he drops his enormous anchor in such a pristine environment:
"Hey guys, come and see this now as, thanks to over-ambitious megalomaniacs like me, it might be your last chance. Enjoy!"
When you sail your modest little yacht into a beautiful, pristine bay, you can enjoy it knowing that you have done everything you can to ensure this natural beauty will survive — you have used the wind to get there, you have not acidified your environment. Your modest little re-cycled boat has not used up huge amounts of resources. Because your small boat is not full of childish toys that suck power, your electricity can be sourced entirely from the sun and the wind. You can kick back in the cool shade of your cockpit with a beer while your honest little boat nuzzles her anchor, and feel the quiet contentment that only comes from being a part of something — a feeling not available to the rich superyacht owner taking a week off from empire-building to use his floating status symbol. As you reach for your sunglasses (and possibly another beer) it cannot help but occur to you that...

Bigger is not Better.

We can simply no longer afford to look at people who are consuming massively disproportionate amounts of the planet's resources as 'successful' people. The world is straining under the weight of over-ambitious people. The philosophy of, 'the more you have, the bigger winner you are' surely belongs in the dustbin of naff, along with the hairy chest/gold medallion combo, 80s' boy-bands, and drunk driving. Big motor yachts like these work against the sea and the wind by trying to overpower them with money in the form of massive diesel engines and thousands of dollars of fuel. A good sailboat (and skipper) works with the sea and therefore reaps the benefits of kinship with the world that no amount of money can buy. When you live in such a pristine environment as the ocean, there is a great deal of pleasure to be derived from feeling like a part of her, rather than her enemy. The rich boater, consuming all in his path (like some kind of marine Pac-Man) to feed his power-hungry leviathan will never know this feeling. 

The environmental and spiritual aspects aside, it is also likely that waiting until you have enough money to sail away in a 70 foot luxury yacht is practically another way of saying 'staying at home'. If you believe in reincarnation, great! Maybe you can have better luck in the next life. But just in case, why not get real in this life with an affordable, small sea-boat and get gone now?

Bigger is not necessarily safer. 

What makes a boat safe, will be discussed throughout this article, but good initial design, proper (and affordable) maintenance, and good seamanship are generally more important than flashy toys and electronic gizmos. Some features of many million-dollar yachts are actually quite dangerous.

You don't have to circumnavigate. In fact, it is far better if you don't. 

As stated in the previous chapter, the trick to becoming a sea gypsy quickly and safely is to buy your new home somewhere exotic, with easy local sailing and good facilities - then start building your skills and pouring some sweat into her. Yet it is a peculiar truth that, should you mention your intention to buy a sailboat, the first question anyone will ask is: 

"Are you going to sail around the world"? 

You never get asked that question if you buy a Land Rover.

 "I see you have an old Defender 110. Are you going to do her up and enter the Paris-Dakar Rally?" 

Never happens.

A harmless question perhaps, but one that will come back to bite you in the bum. Say it is your intention to sail around the world and then you head east from the UK and arrive some years later back in Europe and sell your boat in France. Job done? No. There will always be some negative people back home who will derive embarrassingly high amounts of squirmy pleasure pointing out that you were a few miles short of 'around the world'. What a few negative idiots say is of no importance to us, right? But if you set yourself this goal, you will always feel you have to be moving on, even at inappropriate times. Being a sea gypsy means going with the seas, winds, and currents, not fighting them in order to feel you have lived up to certain expectations, even your own. If your path takes you around the world, all well and good, but it should not be your aim. If it is your aim, then you are still hoping to 'achieve' something. The sea gypsy approach is more concerned with 'enjoying something' - rather than counting miles or joining up imaginary, man-made lines on the planet.

If you decide to go back to land after drifting around the oceans for a few years, you will not have any regrets and that is how it should be. If your path turns out to be longer, all well and good - you will enjoy it more due to the skills you have learned. To live on the beautiful blue ocean is a gift to be treasured, not an achievement to be measured.

Integrate 

So, you have chosen the country where you are going to buy your boat and are on your way to becoming a sea gypsy. All over the world, there are sea gypsies like you and me and it is great to hang out with them. But to really embrace the gifts that your new life is holding out to you, you need to integrate with the local people. And that means having a stab at the language. 

Come on now, don't just put the CDs by the bed and hope they enter your head by osmosis. There are usually cheap classes available virtually everywhere and even where there isn't, you speak English right? There is not a place on Earth where somebody does not want to improve their English and most are more than happy to swap language skills with you. Your whole experience will change if you get a grip on the language and not just when you have mastered it, but from the moment you start learning! One often hears the phrase, "I am no good with languages". 

This is the biggest cop-out in the world. Sure, some people are more natural athletes than others, but we can ALL improve our fitness through exercise, and so it is with languages.

If you don't make an attempt at the language, you will be consigned to speak only with people from your own culture. If that is what you became a sea gypsy for, then great! I am not here to tell anyone not to be happy! All are welcome aboard Calypso for a cold one! (Or at least a tepid one due to our lack of refrigeration). 

I suspect though, that most people are looking forward to mingling with other cultures and your experience in any country will absolutely flower if you can at least speak the lingo a little. Other than Paris, I have never been to a place in all my years of travel where the local people were not more than happy to help with the language. Learning the language also sends a message of respect to local people. It shows that you are trying. 

The Mexicans tell a joke about the Gringos (a type of rich foreigner who invariably does not speak Spanish). They say that some Gringos only say two things: 

1) "Do you speak English?" 

2) "Then find me someone who does." 

It might be just a joke, but it does underline a fairly appalling attitude amongst some yachtsmen who often treat local people as foreigners in their own country. I am sure you don't need telling how much that attitude will limit your experience of a place.

Single people particularly will benefit from an attempt at the language there is no better way to get a second date or break the ice on the first one, than by asking, "perhaps you could help me with my Samoan?" (Note: this seldom works outside Samoa). 

The world is full of beautiful people. If you are young, free and single, then why not meet a few? I cannot think of a better way for a single person to spend his/her time than by learning the language and culture of a place through the direct experience of romance and/or furious bonking. Learning the language will get you much better deals on boat gear too.

If you can learn to say, 

"0K, that is the Gringo price, but I am from Scotland where we only pay the local price" in Spanish, your costs will halve in Latin America and you will get a few laughs too. 

Obviously, if you are only in a country for a few months, this is hardly possible, but once you have identified where you will be buying your boat and starting your sea gypsy life, then buy the CDs and get cracking as you are going to be there a while. 

For French and Spanish, I cannot recommend highly enough the remarkable approach pioneered by Michel Thomas. An extraordinary man who escaped from a Nazi concentration camp (where he was personally tortured by none other than Klaus Barbie himself) and kept one step ahead of the Nazis by learning languages very quickly and switching identities often. He spent his post-war years developing his method of language learning and has taught millions of people who thought they were 'no-hopers' to speak Spanish, German, Polish, English, Russian and French. There is no paperwork with his method, so it is an ideal thing to do on watch or in the cockpit of your floating building site for an hour at the end of every day, gazing out over the anchorage with a rum-based fruit drink.

Slow down, change direction 

Later on, in this article we will see how the need for speed and recognition makes many racing sailors fairly poor sea captains. But for now, I am referring to the common cultural habit of 'goal setting'. It has become so common in our culture to 'set goals' and then try to 'achieve' them, that the ridiculousness of this self-imposed charade goes almost unnoticed. If you cannot shake this rather ingrained western attitude, not only will the sea frustrate you, but so will most developing world cultures who are generally more fatalistic.

When I was in Kenya, I took an engine part to be fixed at a local workshop in Mombassa. I was told it would be ready "kesho". When I looked up 'kesho' in my Swahili dictionary I discovered it means, 'tomorrowé. 

So, feeling rather pleased with myself, I went back the following day and was told the same thing. The next day I was also told "kesho". And the next. Finally, I erupted and shouted:

"You can't keep saying 'kesho' and not meaning it!"

whereupon, a very smiley face patiently explained to me, 

"I am truly sorry sir, but white people not understand, 'kesho'. 

'Kesho' does not mean 'tomorrow' kesho mean, 'not today"

That tickled me so much that it lead to further discussions about the language (which I was, of course, trying to learn) and it turns out that this guy (his name was 'Jenga', like the game with wooden blocks) was a fellow musician and we ended up playing together a bit and I became good friends with his whole family who loved nothing better than to teach me Swahili and hear me mispronounce things. 

I abandoned my 'goal' of leaving Mombassa in the quickest time possible and changed my goal to what was actually happening in my life In effect, I made my goal, 'meet great people, learn Swahili and wait for my part to be fixed'. I was able to achieve this goal very enjoyably not because it was easier or less desirable than my previous one, but because it was what was actually happening in my life, rather than what I hoped was happening in my life. 

I am not suggesting that you lie down and allow yourself to be kicked around by the vagaries of chance if we find ourselves in a rotten situation, then we must fight our way out of it - but as is so often true, the source of our unease is not usually the quality of any particular situation that we are in, but our fixation upon the idea that it should be otherwise, or that we should be somewhere else. (Gotta cover those miles and achieve my 'goals'!)

So when faced with two choices of fairly equal merit, take the one that is actually happening, not the one that you have fixated upon for no other reason than that is what you have fixated upon. This is a good skill to develop because the sea is totally indifferent to your wishes and whether you like it or not, she will often have very different ideas of where she would like you to go.

Change course, go there. 

Do not fixate on your 'goals'. Goals are inventions of the human mind and, unlike sea conditions or other geographical realities, can be changed in an instant. Wind not blowing from where you want it to? Why not change course and go somewhere else? (I discovered the wonderful Percy Islands this way) or go back the way you came and enjoy that place for a while longer? You can't possibly know what the results of your actions will be, so stop fixating on your goals as if they were fuelled by anything more than the conceit that you know what the future holds. You don't. But if you think you do, you will push your boat and yourself into dangerous situations just to get 'there', which in reality does not hold any more promise than anywhere else. 

Some of the best experiences are unplanned and this becomes quite common once you set off on the largely unpredictable path of a watery wanderer. 

The trick, of course, is to try and be aware of it at the time rather than becoming frustrated that the experience you are having is not the same as the one you imagined you would be having when you set your 'goals'.

I cannot list in this article the amount of great experiences I have had by adopting this attitude. Most of the great experiences of life happen when we let go. Sure, some things still suck - into every life a little rain must fall. I don't think any attitude can totally eliminate that. But doesn't the success of any lifestyle lie in the ability to tilt the suck/fun ratio heavily in your favour? This is made a whole bunch easier if you can abandon the desire to achieve your rather arbitrary goals when wind and weather are against you.
99-9% of the time, you will enjoy your new destination as much as (if not more than) the original plan. Some places will still suck, as would be the case if you doggedly stuck to your original itinerary. But at the very least you will have arrived somewhere sucky, having had a good sail to get there with your body, nerves, and boat in one piece and still on speaking terms with the rest of your crew.

Agendas and Schedules 

I think you can already guess what I am going to say about those! But rather than bore you with more ersatz eastern philosophies, I want you to conduct a little experiment. Every time you read of a yachting accident in the press, look for the scheduling error - it is always there, largely overlooked and is usually the root of all subsequent problems. Quite conveniently, it can normally be found at the beginning of the article.
"The weather looked ominous, but I had to be at work on Monday, so we slipped our lines at 0800 and..." or, "We left Hamilton Island for the mainland despite the rudder problems as Freddie had a flight to catch... " or, "We wanted to overtake the yacht ahead, so we were flying full sails in 30 knots..."
The story then goes on to list the terrible events that unfolded — often with a serious injury, loss of life or boat or all three. Quite often, the cause of the accident is given as 'heavy weather' or 'rudder failure' or some other engineering or technical culprit, when the root cause of the accident should be listed as 'attitude problem'.
As I have said already, the sea is totally indifferent to your plans she does not care that Claudia has a bikini wax appointment or Mark's karate class is graduating on Thursday and you have promised to go out for won tons. Put your agenda ahead of the sea, go up against it and see who wins. I know this goes against the macho image of, 'man alone against the mighty sea', but that is all it is - an image. Getting real is about seeing things as they really are, not how we would like them to be or how they are portrayed in the media. The best way to do that without constant disappointment is to learn to appreciate what is actually happening around us rather than constantly attempt to manipulate reality to fit our desires or satisfy our own image of ourselves.
We have become so accustomed to getting what we want right now, that immediate gratification often seems the norm. This is not just wishful thinking but is also a dangerous attitude to take to sea. Sometimes you get pinned in an anchorage for two weeks due to bad weather. Enjoy it. Read a good article, make love with your partner, learn to speak Spanish. Wishing it were otherwise will do no good. Nor will convince yourself that it will be 'alright to leave' when clearly it is not, in order to self-justify your wish to catch the Kentucky Derby on ESPN. Take off your shoes. Wish in one and pee in the other. Do you see which one fills up first? Good! Now you have your proper sea gypsy head-on, let's have a look at what kind of trouble we can get into picking the right boat.